Back again!

I'll start this time with a bit of humour. I am totally serious when I say I will disown anyone gullible enough to buy this product:

http://www.amazon.com/review/RTADRUSXBGGWU/ref=cm_cr_pr_viewpnt#RTADRUSXBGGWU

This is the better of its two reviews. The other is just as sarcastic (I hope) but this says it all. I get it, it isn't easy to find 18 pounds of obsidian that you can craft into a perfect, nicely polished sphere, but after an unsurprisingly brief search on eBay I was able to find decorative obsidian for much cheaper. Here's the thing, though - this is not sold as a decoration. The seller claims this ball of dried-up volcano jizz is supposed to protect you from harm just by sitting there - after all, 18 pounds is too heavy for a lot of people to throw at their enemies effectively.

Oh, no! I should stay away from these guys - the have the Obsidian Ball 04 Rainbow Crystal Black Volcanic Glass Protection Stone Healing Therapy Super Deluxe 18 Lbs. Spiritual Orb 8"! I'll spontaneously combust if I get too close!

I'm not the first to say that crystal healing is a load of crap. Scientific organizations have humoured practitioners with studies that have only ever concluded that it does nothing. Hell, even the Catholic church, which has built up a reputation over the last 2000-odd years for not making sense at the best of times, says not to partake in it because crystals have no intrinsic power.

Hint: They are correct about that.

While crystals do produce an electrical current when compressed, the few practical uses for that effect include record player needles and devices that measure pressure, force and acceleration - buying an expensive crystal, bathing it, leaving it out in the sun, sleeping with it, feeding it, talking to it and blowing your nose on it will only reassure you that you are fucking insane. It will not make all of your problems disappear, unless, of course, your only problems are that you have too much money and too much time on your hands.

TL;DR: Crystal healing is the Pet Rock of alternative medicine.

Back to earth...

By the way, I forgave the Catholic church for most of their infractions when I found out that a Catholic priest originally came up with the Big Bang. It's true. Look it up if you don't believe me. Step two: gay marriage.

It's looking like I'll have a second job on Saturdays busing tables at the gay bar. The shifts end later than at Williams, but knowing that it will only be on Saturday and not two random days of the week will help me prepare for it, I'll never have to work late on a weekday during the school year and since my roommate works there and has a car, she can drive me home. Besides that, the gay bar is a good time. There are few other places where you can have the valuable experience of hearing a DJ say, "First person to show me a Prince Albert wins a prize!"

For those of you who have to look up what a Prince Albert is, don't go right to Google Images if you're squeamish.

As for the garden, it's been quite underwhelming lately. The marigold seedlings I had all died, the lettuce bolted and I cut back the stalk and it's already starting to regrow, the strawberries are still producing, the tomato plant has past its peak, the carrots are stunted but they taste fine, the sunflowers have buds on them, the herbs are doing fine, I have a fair amount of dried chamomile saved up (and lots of seeds), and the tea is taking its time to germinate as expected.

And that's it. Time for bed.